Yeah that was happened to me...
How am I feeling? Startled, broken, sad but you can not let your tears drop in front of your boyfriend or girlfriend right? It was not on my dictionary.
When he said that, my mind recalled 'God, what I've been doing these week? Did I made a mistake?' but then I remember.. I was not.
During these week I did feel 'there is something wrong' with him, but I kept think positive because I trust him. Honestly, I felt like he kept a distance with me, I don't know why but I feel that way. Then someday, I found a picture of him and his friends (3 boys, 1 girl.. The girl sat beside my boy) in nowhere *but I felt familiar with that place. surely out of town* and as I remember this week he never told me that he went out of town with his friends, so while I saw those picture I wondering "when those picture was taken?" you know guys, I never asked him about that... NEVER! Why? Because I believe, someday he would told me about that.. And it happened tonight.
I admitted these conversation started from when I told him that I felt he kept distance on me. Then he asked me back "what do you mean keep a distance?" I answered "I feel you are so far away Hon... I couldn't feel your presence, your soul, your sincerity from your text, your voice, and anything... I couldn't feel that!" He stared at me then he said "Honestly.. I feel bored with this, you know our routine" at that time his words honestly broke my heart, I want to cry so badly but I hold my tears, but he noticed. "I am really sorry but that's what I feel.." he said, then I smiled and stroke his arms then I said "It's okay..I appreciate your honest, thanks for that.. Maybe we can find a way out so you did not feel bored anymore.. What do you want?" He cut my words "what do you mean with that?" I explained "Maybe we need to change our routine.. No need to text me everyday, every time... Just text me when you have important to say, or text me when you really want. Do not text me as your routine." He nodded and said "Okay, we will try.."
After we talked about those issue above, he told me that some days ago he went out of town with his friends *I sighed in relief because he finally told me even already late but its okay for me* he told me everything, he even said sorry because he never told me.. I said its okay, because I know sooner or later he will tell me everything.
When our way back home, I could see in his eyes he feel really sorry about his words (bored issue) , he also told me he is not boring anymore.. I just smiled then ask him to forget our bored topic, I know he feel guilty that's why he told me "he is not boring anymore" some part of my heart trust his words but some parts no.
Wisely... Yes, I try to be wisely and also patient.. I know the power of love can make us stronger and the power of pray it always work. Once again , I just thought our problem tonight is one of many love life exams for us.. Sometimes I need to succumb to defend it. Once I can passed the exams, I am sure I can passed the next exams too :)
I remember his words before we bid goodbye, "please don't ever get bored with me..." I gave him bitter sweet smile and I said "Insya allah I wouldn't" :")
He also text me -after he arrived at his home, this is proof for me that he break our new rule, but I loved that- "please do not away from me.."
And, the conclusion of our shitty tonight is..... "I forgave him... I succumb... and I am so thankful God still blessed our relationship, our love and our heart..."
Insya Allah kita naik kelas hari ini ya bee.... :")
Love,
dhevina
